r3thsp3kt
Johnny Zen
W/L/D
Posts: 2
(7/16/05 8:21 am)
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Today's Moment of Zen
The buzz of the crowd in the XCW arena is slowly turning from exctitement into boredom. The people are anxious for something new, something amazing to happen. They've grown tired of the same repitive cockiness of the heels and the infallible goodness of the faces. They're looking for something fresh, although they themselves do not even knwo it yet. The buzz continues to die down, replaced by the whispers and idle chit-chat of apathy. What is this lull in the show? What's taking them so long? These are the burning questions on everyone's minds. They are beginning to consider heading out to the concession area for a snack...when suddenly their thoughts are interrupted by the arena's p.a. system. Maniacal laughter echoes through the building, and then the Gorillaz' "Feel Good, Inc." roars to life. The excitement is back. They've never heard this song before, so it must be a newcomer. Then he appears on the entrance ramp, doing a goofy but entertaining dance routine that has most of the crowd laughing and cheering, and a few are even singing along. The dancing comes to end as the newcomer jogs to the ring, high-fiving everyone that he can and smiling all the way, and grabs a mic before rolling into the ring. He poses for the crowd until the music ends with a percussive BANG! The newcomer raisees his mic.
Zen: Ah, thank you everyone for this nice warm welcome that you're givin' me. I do so greatly appreciate it, being as how this is my first night here and all. Now for those of you who don't know, my name is Johnny "Zen Master" McFadden, but I've always thought that that was a bit of a mouthful, so you can just call me Johnny Zen.
He pauses for a moment to clear his throat. THe cheering has died down a bit, the crowd obviously interested in hearing what he has to say.
Zen: So I was sittin' at home the other night, watchin' this very same wrestling program that I am appearing on right now, and I thought to myself, I said, "Self...what is the ONE THING that could possibly make the XCW beter than it already is," and I was like, "I don't know Johnny, what," and I thought to myself again, I said, "Self...the ONE THING that could make the XCW better...is none other than Johnny Zen," and then I was like, "Oh, Johnny, you is a genius," and I was like, "Yeah, baby, I know, I know." Then I called up the XCW and they was all like, "Johnny Zen, we needs you, baby." So then I hopped in my sweet ride - that's right, baby, my 1978 Chevrolet Impala, metallic gray, of course - and I sped on over to the XCW offices and they was throwin' money and women and contracts at me, and I just couldn't refuse. So I pulled out a pen and I graced that page with my wonderful John Hancock - that's a signature, for those who don't know -and now...here I am.
Johnny pauses again. The buzzing of the crowd has grown louder.
Zen: Now that that's out of the way, let me just say this: JOHNNY ZEN IS IN THE HOUSE!!!
The crowd roars and Johnny Zen smiles and laughs, obviously having a great time. He raises a hand to quiet the crowd before continuing with his speech.
Zen: Oh, why thank you, my friends, thank you. I am sure that I will prove myself to be deserving of those cheers later tonight when I lay down some serious ownage - yes, that's right, OWNAGE - on my less-than-impressive opponent in tonight's Flaming Table match. For tonight, I will put on a performance so amazing, so spectacular, so...*pauses for dramatic effect and smiles*...Zen-sational., that you fans here tonight, and all those watching at home, will have no choice but to doubt the awesomeness that your own eyes are seeing, for so great the awesomeness that I exude will be...but that's enough chit-chat. I gots to go get ready for the fight. PEACE!
Johnny drops the mic and rolls out of the ring, jogging toward the backstage area as the crowd is still cheering.
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